don't get so emotional...(EXCUSE ME?!)

adhd authenticity failure mindset neurodivergence womanhood Sep 29, 2023
Weirdly Wired Women
don't get so emotional...(EXCUSE ME?!)

"Don't get so emotional."

That's right up there with "calm down" as phrases guaranteed to elicit the exact opposite reaction than the words request...

I'm not sure which is worse.

It probably doesn't matter, since they mean basically the same thing:

"Your reaction is making me uncomfortable, so stop."

I understand the logic. As a parent, it crosses my mind regularly.

If you, small child, were not losing your sh!t over putting on your shoes, I, your loving mother, would not be on the verge of losing mine.

This goes for anyone who seems to be in your life specifically to push your buttons.

Even though I recognized no one can MAKE me feel anything, it's really hard not to place the blame. I mean, it seems like a pretty straightforward cause and effect, right?

But it isn't.

If it was, every shoe meltdown would result in the same response by me.

But it doesn't.

My emotional reaction is entirely dependent on how my day has been.

Most of the time, I show compassion, empathy and patience. And, well, I'm working on those other times.

The double-edged sword

Many times, letting our emotions do their thing isn't so bad...our excitement, enthusiasm, and energy can inspire.

Our compassion, empathy, and sensitivity can comfort.

Our detest for injustice can change the world.


We can also feel incredibly inadequate, insignificant, and like we're always failing.

And those can stop us from doing all those other wonderful things.

Our emotions are ours to regulate. And those negative ones can be hard af to manage.

If you're tired, hungry, or stressed, you'll struggle with it.

If you never really learned how to do it as a kid, you'll struggle with it.

And if you're neurodivergent or a ruminator, you'll absolutely struggle with it.

On this week's podcast episode, guest Meredith Carder and I talk about our own struggles with feelings of failure and what we do when they crop up. You can find it on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and (probably) the other platforms you're likely to listen on.

Note: as per requirement on a weirdly wired podcast, we also go off on many tangents!

Have a wonderful and weird weekend!